Muting is becoming a way to limit the demands of digital friendship while keeping the relationship intact, as constant access creates new pressure around when and how quickly friends are expected to respond.
Messaging has made close friends easier to reach and harder to step away from. Conversations can continue across a day without a clear ending, while unanswered messages remain visible and notifications repeatedly bring the same relationship back into view. For some people, maintaining a friendship now also involves deciding how much access that friendship should have to their attention.
A MyIQ survey of 10,847 adults across the United States, the United Kingdom, Canada, and Australia, as well as Latin America and the European Union, found that 29% had muted a close friend or best friend on a messaging or social platform because they wanted less contact without ending the relationship. Among women, the figure reached 34%, compared with 24% of men.
The gender difference also appeared in how respondents handled ongoing conversations. 52% of women said they had deliberately delayed replying to a close friend because the expectation of continuing the exchange felt draining, compared with 39% of men. 36% of women said they had felt guilty for failing to respond quickly enough to a friend, versus 26% of men.
The results point to a form of strain that can exist inside otherwise valued relationships. Frequent contact can make friendship feel more demanding when every new message creates another decision about whether to respond, postpone the conversation, or leave it unanswered.
Muting gives people a relatively discreet way to manage that pressure. It reduces how often a friend interrupts their attention while leaving the channel of communication open and the relationship formally unchanged.
Its effects are mixed. Among respondents who had muted a close friend, 58% said doing so made the friendship easier to manage, while 21% said the reduction in contact eventually made the friendship more distant. Respondents could report both outcomes.
The contrast shows the trade-off built into the behaviour. Reducing the frequency of contact can make a relationship feel less demanding, while fewer routine exchanges can also create greater distance over time.
Age was strongly associated with the practice. 41% of adults aged 18-24 said they had muted a close friend, compared with 36% of those aged 25-34, 27% of those aged 35-54 and 17% of adults aged 55 and over.
The survey does not establish why the behaviour is more common among younger respondents. It does show a consistent decline across every older age group measured, placing muting more firmly within the friendship habits of younger adults.
The findings capture a broader tension in digitally maintained relationships. Easy access can help friendships survive distance and busy schedules, but it can also make periods of silence feel more deliberate than they once did. Tools originally built to manage notifications are increasingly being used to manage social expectations as well.
Friendship once came with unavoidable pauses. Increasingly, people are having to create those pauses themselves.
About MyIQ:
MyIQ was launched in 2024 and is used by over a million individuals worldwide. It is a digital self-knowledge platform that offers more than an IQ score, with over 9 million completed tests across the various test categories: cognitive, personality, and relationships, all with personalised, actionable insights. The platform offers over 25 brain games, more than 150 intelligence puzzles, over 20 hours of expert video content, and 300+ available lessons on emotional intelligence, problem-solving, innovation, confidence-building, and decision-making. Through its IQ test, full-spectrum personality assessment, and relationship insight quiz, MyIQ delivers structured, personalized feedback that helps individuals better understand their inner world and behaviour.
MyIQ was launched in 2024 and is used by over a million individuals worldwide. It is a digital self-knowledge platform that offers more than an IQ score, with over 9 million completed tests across the various test categories: cognitive, personality, and relationships, all with personalised, actionable insights. The platform offers over 25 brain games, more than 150 intelligence puzzles, over 20 hours of expert video content, and 300+ available lessons on emotional intelligence, problem-solving, innovation, confidence-building, and decision-making. Through its IQ test, full-spectrum personality assessment, and relationship insight quiz, MyIQ delivers structured, personalized feedback that helps individuals better understand their inner world and behaviour.